I’m Over The Social Beauty Standard

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I let my 6-year-old daughter do one of those camera filter effects with me (we usually play around on the filters for fun anyways), she sees herself and asks “Do I really look like that?” I said well no. She said “I wish I looked like that.”

I told her she looked even more beautiful in person.

It was in that moment I realized even a 6-year-old is having envious thoughts of wishing she looked a certain way that these filters portray we could, or should look like.

No wonder everyone wants plastic surgery. Especially with literally everything just right in your face. We can’t even take a selfie without a filter anymore, without everyone having a disposition about they way they look.

I wish I looked like smoothed out, flawless perfection too. But that just isn’t real life!

My demons and negative voices constantly attack my outer appearance. I’ve literally sat and cried in front of the mirror and just believed them telling me how ugly I was. Saying things like:

“You’re too fat, I don’t even know why you go to the gym.”

“Its not like you’ll ever look like those fitness influencers you follow on IG.”

Some days I’ll avoid a mirror totally except putting on a little make up-those days.

I know, it sounds super pathetic, but I can’t control how I feel when those negative thoughts get to me like that.

But what I’ve learned is that attacking your appearance and having those negative voices telling you that you’re not good enough, will never will be the answer.

If you don’t like what you see in the mirror, fix it. I don’t mean go to a plastic surgeon because you feel like your nose is too big or small or your right eye is higher up than the left. I mean if you don’t like what you see, you can work to make yourself feel better, but I believe it truly has nothing to do with the way you look, but what you know the person looking back at you is feeling.

It’s so believable sometimes, but I just have to keep pressing on and work through these negative thoughts.

One thing though, we all have some sort of pain we deal with.

Whether its deep rooted or on the tip top surface. For me, it was a rough-around-the-edges parent that inadvertently pushed me to be the best at everything I tried to do and learn to deal with being uncomfortable majority of the time because of the anxiety I developed at a young age.

Everyone is a little messed up! And you know what? I find that extremely endearing. Not that I want anyone to go through anything horrible and don’t wish peace on earth and good-will. But its endearing that we are all humans just making our way from this life to the next. Trying to get by.

Sometimes we go through things that are necessary to shape us and to make us stronger. At the end of the day, we can only keep pushing to work to make ourselves happy.

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